01.03.2026
S: I fear contentment.
A: Why?
S: It is the hunger that makes The Tiger what he is. When you look at singers, boxers, actors, they are always their best when they are hungry for it. Not when they have made it.
A: How can you keep the hunger alive?
S: This is the fear. I have money. I have a girlfriend. I have many jobs. I have been published everywhere for serious writing. I don’t want the contentment to eat up my ambition.
A: There is one thing that you don’t have. Children.
S: That is very true. And I also do not have fame.
A: So can you not keep on with the hunger?
S: I want to see our community advance. I want to be the champion for the Dalits, the Oppressed. I want the name of our family to be known.
A: Is that not hunger enough?
S: I fear that one day I will put the pen down, that I will put the brush down, that I will put the camera down. I fear that one day I will give up.
A: You have not given up. You have been at this writing game ever since you were a youngster. However little love or reward you have been given, you have kept up at it.
S: The second book. I have not been able to work on it.
A: Your project was to find love. You are allowed to have a life. You cannot live solely for the people.
S: Gaining this love, I don’t want it to kill my hunger.
A: You fear selfishness, happiness. You fear contentment. You are allowed and deserve to be happy. Just remember The People, The Mother and The Revolution. Be the names of power, the prayer of The People, The Tiger, god.
S: We are in a race. Tiredness threatens to overcome.
A: Remember your promise. You are a man too and not just the community.
diary of a lone man 