jesus, paranoia and imperialism

15.05.2026

S: With imperialism, you can trust no one. No one is your real friend.

A: What do you mean? There’s always someone that you can trust.

S: Every friend will betray you for the empire.

A: Typical cynicism.

S: It is in the bible.

A: How so?

S: Does not Judas betray Christ? Is it not said that each one of his disciples will deny him? And why do they do it? They do it in service of the Roman Empire. The situation of Christ is the situation of the colonised in the age of Imperialism. It is the same age that we are living in now. The fact is that the oppressor kills the oppressed. The oppressor makes sure that the oppressed is betrayed.

A: No one wants to hear your interpretation of the scriptures. You are not even Christian.

S: Be that as it may be, the oppressed can read the life of the oppressed.

A: Any more jewels to bestow upon us with these readings?

S: In a selfish and greedy regime, where arrogance and a lack of empathy are the hallmarks of those supposedly successful in that society, where there is only the worship of wealth and status rather than spiritual growth, a genius like Christ can only encounter envy, hatred, jealousy and betrayal from even those that call himself his friends and peers. This has been the way throughout the whole of human history. Because those that are the worst lead. Those that are the worst exploit others and win power. Those that are not fit to be called human beings have to prove themselves superior.

A: This lesson is obviously not about Christ, is it?

S: It is about the present, with the rise of fascism in the world and where, unmistakably, powers like America and Russia are clearly empires, as well as the so-called ‘developed’ world which lords it over the ‘developing’ world by exploiting their natural resources and manpower. This age of capitalism, globalisation, what is it except for a new empire, neo-imperialism? It is this world that we live in, this world of the empire. And in it, Christ once more has to watch betrayal after betrayal. Because the clever man, the better man, the god on earth, the genius, the master of living, he has to watch the wretches around him sell him out and deny him.

A: They say that the colonised have a persecution complex. They suffer from paranoia.

S: It is not paranoia. Freud, himself the persecuted Jew, he said that even the paranoiac is not without justification. Man is a wolf to man. It is what the persecuted know. And Freud knew more than most – he was also a genius in Nazi Germany. They hated his cleverness. The colonised and the geniuses know the truth of this society of imperialism, hate and oppression.

the rationality of death

23.04.2026

S: Camus asks this question, why should we not commit suicide? It is the one question. The great question.

A: And what do you think of Camus?

S: Does a man need a reason to live? Why does he need a reason to live? Why can he not just live life? And this is what Camus says. That there is no reason to live. Just to live life.

A: Can you just live life without any meaning in it?

S: Who knows? Viktor Frankl says that you have to have a meaningful life.

A: Why do you keep on living yourself?

S: Do you know something? The most rational thing would be to die.

A: Surely, you jest.

S: Not at all. This life is confusion. This life is suffering. Hurt and disappointment. This life is a cage. This life is isolation. This life is one full of suspicion, misunderstanding, prejudice, hate, injustice, apathy and hostility. How sweet it would be to free from all this! The rational decision would be to die. It is no surprise why people choose to commit suicide.

A: Why then do you live if there is nothing to live for?

S: Duty ties me down to the earth when I should be sitting in heaven. The family. The community. The Oppressed. The Mother. The duty to keep on living for others. The duty not to be known as a coward that could not face life when I must be brave because I am the warrior and the splendour of Punjab. For myself, I would not live.

A: Do you really think that those poor souls that commit suicide are free? That they have escaped this world which you find so mean and cheap?

S: What else? Do you know where psychologists say that you find the utmost happiness? In a flow state. When you forget about everything else except for the activity that you love. In which the self is completely extinguished. What about sex? For that moment of bliss when you come, you forget everything. It is the little death. The utmost happiness is death. It is the rational decision.

A: The rational decision is life. To live. To make the world a better place. To fight those that would make it a hell.

S: Why do you think god has come down upon the earth? Because it was too full of sin. That is why he is reborn every time, when sin outweighs goodness. But has he come down from heaven for happiness? No. The common crowd follow happiness. The god follows duty. His mother called for him because they had tried to take The Mother’s honour. The people prayed for him to come into the world because they were oppressed. They asked for a champion. Duty binds the god to this world. The work has not been achieved yet. The Revolution has not come. I am the child of destiny, of fate. The gifts have been given to me. I am The Tiger. And since I am The Tiger, I have to show energy. I have to show life. The seductions of easeful death are great. The mouth waters. But there are only two deaths available to The Tiger. A glorious death in battle. Or in bed. There is no real war. And there are too many years left still to be lived for this peaceful death in the bed. So we live. With reluctance.

reluctance to write

A: I notice that you are reluctant to write at the moment.

S: One wonders where it goes. One wonders what it does. One wonders, in short, why?

A: You have your readers.

S: Enemies and critics.

A: You have something to say.

S: Which no one wants to listen to.

A: You are The Tiger.

S: The mortal enemy of this world.

A: You cannot stop writing. They expect. They read you every day in every way.

S: There is only one reason why I write. So that they cannot defeat me. Defeat us. The Oppressed. This learning, it is for The Oppressed. This mind, it is for The Oppressed. This body? It belongs to The Oppressed.

A: Why can you not just live for yourself?

S: I am The Oppressed. I am The Mother. It is the authentic self. There is nothing other.

A: Write then for them.

S: Have you ever considered the language of the warrior?

A: What do you mean?

S: The words of a fighter are charged with energy, absolute energy. It is the fight. The pen is not mightier than the sword. The pen itself is the sword.

A: Language as a weapon?

S: Language as the fist. Language as the kick. Language as the choke hold. The mastery over the language is the mastery over the martial arts.

A: Who has taught you this?

S: The gurus. The activists. The scholars. Hindi film. They have made the writer into the warrior. And the duty of the warrior? Even when he is cut into pieces, he will fight. Even when all else have been defeated and he stands as the last man on the battlefield, he will fight. Fighting is what he was born and raised to do. It is his life. And so, he fights. He writes.

A: With reluctance?

S: The war is hard. Life is hard. Yes, with reluctance. But still he writes. Because he believes in that one spark that will light up this world. That precious one, that precious reader that will become The Tiger too. What The Oppressed pray for, what The Mother desires. Freedom.

dishonourable peace or honourable revolution

21.04.2026

A: The words ‘peace’ and ‘revolution’ in Hindi rhyme. ‘Shanti’ and ‘Kranti’.

S: What would you rather have? Shanti ya kranti? Peace or Revolution?

A: I am sure that most people would say peace.

S: I do not.

A: You would rather not have calm in your life?

S: Where peace is dishonourable, it is unacceptable. The choice is simple.

A: You think the Revolution is honourable?

S: What else?

A: Why talk always about honour?

S: Because we come from the honour society. We are honour. The Mother who we worship is our honour.

A: How is peace dishonourable?

S: Do you know what Sophie Scholl’s last words were before the Nazis killed her for resisting them? She said, “How can we expect righteousness to prevail when there is hardly anyone willing to give himself up individually to a righteous cause?” We are living in the times of the fascists. We are living in the times of the haters and the cowards. We are living in the time of discrimination, injustice and lies. To accept peace on their terms, with those that are dishonourable, is tantamount to being dishonourable onself. And if we have spent our whole life fighting for our honour, for the honour of our mother, how could we look at ourselves in the mirror or look anyone else in the face? To have honour is to be righteous. It is to fight for righteousness. The Revolution over a dishonourable peace every time.

A: What is so honourable about The Revolution?

S: The Revolution is against the dishonourable in the name of honour, of The Mother’s honour. The Mother is honour. The Mother is us.

A: They hate you for saying that The Mother is honour and that she is your honour.

S: So what? Everything that they say and do is delusion and oppression. It is a lie. Their thoughts are lies and their lives are lies. One does not listen to a fool or a coward. That is what they do. Not us. We are Punjabi. We are the Tigers of Punjab. A real man does not listen to those that would make him a non-man.

A: Live without calm. Live without peace.

S: I am blessed that I live without peace. I am blessed that I am the warrior. I am blessed that I have chosen The Revolution. Because in The Revolution there is glory, the bliss of glory. There is only one lack. A warrior worthy to be the enemy of The Tiger. The enemy does not have a Karana in their midst. All they have is corruption.

A: You are an intellectual terrorist. That is what they think of you.

S: The intellectual terrorist is them. They live their law through coercion and duress. Their taxes and their exploitation of the Oppressed is gained through coercion and duress. They pretend there is the illusion of choice and freedom when all they have is their cage and their prison. Their thought is a cage and a prison. Their thought is violence against us and The Mother. Yes, they are the intellectual terrorists. And I? I am god. I am the liberator. I am The Tiger. I am freedom. The ungovernable wild beast.

at the end of the long day

19.04.2026

S: It is the end of the long day. What is there to say now?

A: One can reflect upon a day, a moment, a life.

S: You ask for me to reflect? In this day, aside from work, I went upon the Cutty Sark. I went to a charity bookshop. I went to a fayre where I bought a biography of Marilyn Munroe for three pounds. I listened to music concerts all day. I went to Canary Wharf to look upon the waterfront and the big skyscrapers. I went into the parks around the Embankment. I had dinner with my girlfriend. I learnt Spanish, French, Hindi, Punjabi and Urdu. I read psychology articles. I learnt Art History. I ate a chocolate profiterole dessert from Marks and Spencer’s. I listened to Hindi music from the films.

A: Are you not tired? You have spent this whole week rushing around.

S: You know that I do not get tired. Especially when the sun is out. But as I was walking the Cutty Sark, which is a boat that is stationary, I thought to myself that this is a metaphor for self-reflection. We are upon the journey of life. But then, we take out a moment from this journey. The ship stops sailing. We explore the frozen journey, to find out where it is taking us, what it is. We become explorers of the pause.

A: Where would you like this journey to take you?

S: To the beating heart of the enemy.

A: That is your wish? You could have love.

S: One loves the enemy. One wants to clutch at the enemy. To hold them the closest. So that one could squeeze what is inside out of them.

A: Forget enmity. You are the lover. You have a lover.

S: To forget the enemy is to forget myself. I am the warrior.

A: Forget. Tell me a story.

S: Once there was this king that rinsed everything outside of himself because of her. And she watched him rinsing everything out of himself as he grew smaller and smaller. He almost became too small and she did nothing to stop him. Because she enjoyed how much she tormented him and wanted to see if there was any limit to what he would do for her. There was not. But one day, when he was at the end, when there was almost nothing left to rinse, this king stopped. She did not love him. She was not the lover. She was only one that he thought that he knew and loved. She had not liked that he was the king and would want him diminished. He cast her off. And there was so much in him that even now there was more than anyone else. And he kept on growing and growing. He was the splendour of the sun.

A: What happened to her?

S: The life of those without love is the everyday story of the people here. Ask any of them how they live their loveless lives of lies, hate and oppression. That is her story too.

you or me

13.04.2026

S: It comes down to you or me.

A: What does?

S: The fight. Either we can be destroyed. Or them.

A: Why can you not live with difference?

S: We can. But they have decided to eliminate difference. And therefore, it becomes us against them. You or me. And I choose me. I choose difference.

A: You will not accept destruction?

S: Six thousand years of the reign of The Tiger. That is what we are talking about. The loss to the world if we were gone would be immense. Selfishness and greed would choke this world. There would be no love left in the universe. There would be no men left. You would accept the destruction of all that is good in this world? The counter to oppression is freedom. The counter to tyranny and the narrow mind is the limitless.

A: How do you know that they are not right about you? That you are toxic?

S: If a real man is regarded as toxic, then the non-toxic is nothing good.

A: They see you as outdated.

S: They are a petty interruption to the larger history of man. Their opinion is of no consequence.

A: They hold the reins. They have the power.

S: That is not true. Only the warrior holds the power. We shape the world according to our will.

A: How do you know that you are the warrior?

S: This fight, this hard and long fight, I have been fighting it my whole adult life. We will never bend. We will never kneel. If to be us is sin, then we are sinners. If loving The Mother is a test, then we will past the test. We remain undefeated. However much they hate us, we survive. We prosper despite their hate. This territory, it is ours.

A: They say that an enemy knows an enemy.

S: What they should know is that I live for revenge.

A: What is this revenge?

S: In our culture, revenge is what transforms this world. My blood is in this world. They are our future. And for them, and for the ones that come after them, they cannot be subjected to what I was subjected to. I love them too much for that. The revenge is success. We will force our success down their throats. We will hold the reins.

A: How is your revenge going?

S: I am prosperous. My name and my writing is everywhere. I am already a role model. I have achieved what other people only dream of. I have five degrees and a doctorate. I am a doctor. A published author. A published poet. A published photographer. A published artist. I am the pride of Punjab.

A: Yet you are not satisfied with your revenge.

S: The older an enmity, the more dangerous it becomes. This is a line from a Hindi film. Yes, I am still not satisfied. The success has not choked them yet.

the characteristics of the arrogant

12.04.2026

S: What do you think of arrogance?

A: What do you mean? Does not everyone hate it?

S: Not at all. The leaders that the people vote in are all arrogant. There is right wing fascism taking over the world right now. The incapable are in power with just bluster and bullshit. How can you say that the people hate arrogance? They love it.

A: The typical jaded view.

S: Do you know the ones? They were and are and will be self-absorbed narcissists, arrogant and preening bastards. Without much to offer. And yet, they find that they have love, adulation, relationships, money, everything.

A: Why not become like them?

S: Don’t you always tell me that I am one of them? That I always boast and strut around?

A: You are not arrogant. You never talk down to anyone. You merely change the canter of the horse for each individual.

S: At the same time, I believe I am the best. That there is no one better. What do you think of that?

A: It comes down to the distinction that they make between confidence and arrogance. A woman will like confidence she says. But not arrogance.

S: The thin line. The line of discretion.

A: Tell me the characteristics of the arrogant.

S: The arrogant cannot listen to anyone else. They are deaf. The arrogant cannot see anyone else. They are blind. The arrogant can only see their own perspective, no one else’s. The arrogant believe themselves to be morally superior to everyone else, that there can be no better way of doing things. The arrogant believe that they are entitled to all the good things in the world. They should be the writers, artists, singers, managers, lovers. The arrogant have had every privilege handed to them in life from birth. They are first born sons. They are born rich. They are born into the dominant culture, the culture of domination. They might be exceptional in some way, like looks for instance. Which have gone to their head.

A: This composite is based on what?

S: A lifetime of looking. Do you not remember that I have been to a grammar school and the London School of Economics? I have studied with the richest people in London and the country and the world. I have worked with many managers over a lifetime. I know exactly what they think – that everything is for them, that no one is better than them. And they will ruthlessly crush real talent when it rises from someone down the food chain that will not kow tow to them. The example is standing before you.

A: How can you fight them if you do not become them? You have to become an authority.

S: If to become an authority means to sell your soul and your identity, it is not worth it. If power comes to evil, then power has to be forsaken. Resistance is honesty, the honesty of humility.

A: You say that you are humble. You have never accepted anyone’s authority or claim to power above yourself.

S: I am named after god. I am god. I am named after The Tiger. I am The Tiger. I am absolute power on this earth. Only The Mother is above me and she dwells not on earth, but in heaven. I am the anarchist. I accept no one above me. I accept no greater earthly power.

A: Is this not arrogance?

S: We come to shades of thought. This is self-belief. This is confidence. I am the splendour of Punjab, of India. I am the son of the soil. I am the champion of the people. I am their ego. Yet, I listen to others. I try to understand others. I try to see through their eyes. I serve them. Because a king does not rule, he serves the people. I come from a Sikh background as well as a Hindu one. We serve the community. We protect the community. And that means putting their needs above our needs. Putting their wants above our wants. They have prayed for a hero to protect the honour of The Mother. And the hero has been born into humble conditions where he has learnt humility. The hero cannot be arrogance. As Gandhi remembered, the leader of the people has abject humility and embraces poverty. He rejects show for substance. And the sin of unjustified false pride for justified recognition of the splendour that is The Mother and her representative on earth, The Tiger.

nothing in particular

01.04.2026

Already, it was April. The year was passing quickly. Everything was so fast nowadays. You would blink and you would miss it, that was the pace of life nowadays. We were talking about nothing in particular. Alfonso was lounging about, although he always lounged about with a certain style. He was wearing a cream suit with a pale green shirt and the top buttons were undone. I had been telling him that there were those that would listen avidly when I relayed our conversations about life and things. They were always eager for the next installment for their own unknown reasons.

Alfonso had just recommended a hotel to me for a trip that I was set on doing abroad. It was a special place and I had special plans there.

Alfonso drawled, ‘Why do you want so much to escape London? I thought that you loved London’.

I thought for a moment. I was remembering what life had been like before London, when I would only enter the city to visit my grandparents. ‘Life in London is very beautiful. But there is a world outside. There are many places outside of London. After all, it is not the world.’

‘After all, it is not the world.’ Alfonso mused. ‘But has not London become the world now? Is not the whole world like London, touched by London, a part of London?’

‘In many senses,’ I said, having considered it, ‘you are right. There is very little difference between places in the world and they are all touched by London and the West. But still, there remains that little bit of difference. And it is our duty to learn that difference and to extend it and extend it. Because there cannot be the rule of the one. There has to be difference. And I am difference.’

‘Difference is a word that you use often,’ Alfonso said with a touch of grandeur. ‘Does anyone really know what difference is? You like to say that difference is yourself. But how much are you difference and how much are you something of the same? You would have yourself as an original and the world as a copy.’

‘What is this world but a tired copy?’ I asked Alfonso. ‘Do you not tire of the grey? Do you think that a real original can exist in this world of the fascimile, of the fake?’

‘Somehow,’ archly said Alfonso, ‘you survive as an original.’

‘It comes at a price,’ I returned. ‘There is much suffering in being original.’

‘You are not a penniless starving artist in a garret,’ spoke Alfonso. ‘In fact, you have more than enough. Your belly is full.’

‘It is not what I am worth that I am rewarded with.’

‘Take what you can get.’

‘This heart craves honour.’

‘This honour that you want,’ said Alfonso, ‘it is only possible on the battlefield or if you change the world.’

‘The world is there to be changed. She is there for the turning.’

‘That is your mistake.’ Alfonso looked at me keenly. ‘What is it that fills you with this optimism, this belief in your own power to transform reality?’

‘You know my beliefs,’ I said. ‘I believe in destiny. I believe that I am destiny. I believe that I am god born upon this world. That I will answer the prayers of the people for justice and transformation, for good over evil, for love and belonging and happiness. I believe that the tears of the people should be wiped away. That there will be real diversity and inclusion in this world. I believe that the warrior will bring real peace and joy to the people. I believe that the hero has enough strength in him, that I have enough strength in me. I believe that one that wants something bad enough, that works bad enough for it, that this limitless energy and aspiration that is in me, it will come to fruition.’

‘But at the same time, you are a pessimist, cynic and a realist. You believe that man is a wolf to man.’

‘There is a difference between knowing how things are and a deluded hope. There is a difference, also, between a can-do attitude and absolute negativity. There are those that have fought before me. They have given us our hard-won rights. And it is up to us to keep fighting for them, to fight and fight and fight.’

‘You have always lost every battle.’

‘But that is not to say that I am not right. This whole world is against me. Nobody is pleased with me. Because I do not accept the rule of the majority. I do not accept dishonour. I am the greatest and the best. I am the splendour and the pride of Punjab. I am The Tiger. Why should they always have what they want? Why should they be the ones that decide? I am the one that will have what I want. I am the one that will have what I decide. Who has been able to stop me? I am the poet. I am the artist. I am the photographer. I am the writer. I am the historian. I am the journalist. I am the truth. I am justice. I am right. I am strength. I am resolve. I am revenge. I am The Tiger.’

Alfonso sighed. He believed that I always ended on a boast. But why not? There were others singing my praises but still I sang my own. What I believed was inside me, which was god, that had to be recognised in this world. There was so much good that came from me, that transformed the reality around me. I had not lost every battle. I had won many. There were so many that I had touched, that I had given to. I was aware of my own power. And, I was the culture. I was the learning of Punjab, of India. I was six thousand years. I was greatness. If it did not come out, who would know what we were? Who would know the reality of the god?

the fear of contentment

01.03.2026

S: I fear contentment.

A: Why?

S: It is the hunger that makes The Tiger what he is. When you look at singers, boxers, actors, they are always their best when they are hungry for it. Not when they have made it.

A: How can you keep the hunger alive?

S: This is the fear. I have money. I have a girlfriend. I have many jobs. I have been published everywhere for serious writing. I don’t want the contentment to eat up my ambition.

A: There is one thing that you don’t have. Children.

S: That is very true. And I also do not have fame.

A: So can you not keep on with the hunger?

S: I want to see our community advance. I want to be the champion for the Dalits, the Oppressed. I want the name of our family to be known.

A: Is that not hunger enough?

S: I fear that one day I will put the pen down, that I will put the brush down, that I will put the camera down. I fear that one day I will give up.

A: You have not given up. You have been at this writing game ever since you were a youngster. However little love or reward you have been given, you have kept up at it.

S: The second book. I have not been able to work on it.

A: Your project was to find love. You are allowed to have a life. You cannot live solely for the people.

S: Gaining this love, I don’t want it to kill my hunger.

A: You fear selfishness, happiness. You fear contentment. You are allowed and deserve to be happy. Just remember The People, The Mother and The Revolution. Be the names of power, the prayer of The People, The Tiger, god.

S: We are in a race. Tiredness threatens to overcome.

A: Remember your promise. You are a man too and not just the community.

Suneel’s Christmas Message – TfL RACE CNG Newsletter December 2025

It is time to write a Christmas message. I write this message as someone that comes from a Hindu, Guru Ravidasia and Sikh background but, as everyone knows, Christmas has become cosmopolitan in the United Kingdom, even regarded by many as a secular festival. All faiths and backgrounds sit together on Christmas day to make it an occasion for family and friends. Christmas is celebrated in different ways by all of us but we share the celebration together.

In my view, one of the themes of Christmas is a belief in dignity against a society that may take dignity away from people. Jesus is born to a poor family, in a stable, and first welcomed by shepherds—people on the margins of society. In addition, Jesus was a Jew from Galilee and Jews in 1st-century Judea were an ethno-religious minority living under Roman imperial rule, with limited political power. Within the Roman world, Jewish people were often stereotyped, taxed heavily, and at times persecuted for their customs and beliefs. So for me, the nativity story, which sees Jesus as God, returns dignity among those often overlooked.

If there was an earnest belief in dignity, I believe the work of improving society would have been done and the champions of diversity could rest. This could have happened long ago. One of the great examples of the belief in dignity is the Edict of Ashoka from the 3rd Century BCE. Reeling from the devastation of wars that he had caused, wracked by guilt, Ashoka turned to compassion and respect for all people to transform himself and his world.

In his rock and pillar edicts, Ashoka affirmed the inherent dignity of every individual, passing over divisions of ethnicity, religion, or social status. Ashoka supported religious tolerance among Buddhists, Hindus, Jains, Greeks, Persians, and other groups within the empire. He promoted equal justice and humane treatment under the law, as well as respectful dialogue between cultures rather than dominance or suppression. Ashoka wrote that honouring others’ beliefs “strengthens one’s own faith,” reflecting an early understanding that dignity and equality thrive in diverse societies.

The nativity story and Ashoka matter to us today. The belief in human dignity is not a modern invention but has deep historical roots. This belief has long been essential to peaceful coexistence in multicultural societies. I hope that we can all believe in dignity so that we can all live dignified lives. Not just at Christmas, but all the year round. My thoughts go out to the Jewish community as I write because of the recent Bondi Beach mass shooting, but also to all in this world affected by those for whom there is evidently not a belief in dignity, of the dignity of life, the dignity of choice, the dignity of difference and the dignity of diversity.

Dr. Suneel Mehmi (Lead Editor)