14.10.2026
I can speak seven languages. Not fluently in all languages, not by any means. But I can read well in each language. Hindi, Punjabi, Urdu, Spanish, French, German and English. My weakest are Spanish and German (I can read Ancient Greek script as well because I did Ancient History at GCSE which I got an A for as well, but have forgotten most of the vocabulary).
However, on my bookshelves at home, I have textbooks and dictionaries in all of the languages that I want to learn: Mandarin, Cantonese, Korean, Japanese, Greek, Italian, Ancient Greek, Sanskrit, Latin, Russian, Portuguese, Modern Greek… But where is the time to do the study? I don’t even understand how I could have got to seven languages already with no time to do anything (I am being modest. It is because of my ability to remember and to retain stuff).
Alongside these language books, there are primers on photography, graphic design, art, architecture, economics, history, botany and plant science. Dictionaries of quotations. There are over 600 books on my bookshelves.
Despite all of the things that I do, all of the many jobs (Curator, Tour Guide, Writer, Publisher, Historian, Scholar, Artist, Writer, Photographer, Manager, Visitor Experience, Administrator, etc.), I still have so many things that I want to learn and to do. There is a never ending list.
And the obstacles? Time and energy. Time and energy. The books I have managed to buy from charity shops at little expense. You work all day. You come home. Do you have enough energy to read those books, to study those books? Do you have enough time to go over things again and again until they are settled in your memory? Especially when you are doing degrees and graduate degrees while working?
In the old days, to be a scholar meant to be a monk. That would free you up for studying all day long. You didn’t have to earn a crust. You didn’t have romantic entanglements. You could just study and study and study with no distractions.
Undoubtedly, the best time for study was when I was a full time student. There were bags and bags of time to study. Being an adult student is hard work.
I know that I can do it. I completed an Art History degree with First Class honours alongside a professional floristy qualification while I was working. With my personality, it is never enough. I want to be a genius. And genius requires work. And work requires time and energy.
The question is, when will this energy run out? I work, I volunteer, I love, I keep up with my friends and family. I write and write and write. I cram in as much reading as I can. It gets harder and harder as more and more things become crammed into life. But always there is this ache for learning. For more learning. I ache and ache and ache. It is the hunger. The one thing that they cannot teach you. You have to be born with it. And no one is more hungry than The Oppressed, the Low Castes, The Dalits who were starved of learning. I have to live with this hunger and ache with this hunger. It will never be over.
